What Do You Seek?

Then Jesus turned, and seeing them following, said to them, “What do you seek?”  

John 1:38 NKJV

 

What do you hope to gain by following Jesus? Have you ever really thought about it?

Are you after His blessing and favor in your life? Do you need Him to fix your financial situation? Do you need His healing touch? Is your marriage broken?

We all have things in our lives that would benefit from Jesus’ intervention, and He longs to intervene! But sometimes I believe we miss God’s blessing in our lives because our focus remains on the things we need Him to do for us instead of centering on Jesus Himself.

Dear one, Jesus longs to transform your heart above all else.

I recently came across this letter I wrote to Jesus in February, 2009. I penned the words in a journal in response to Jesus’ question to His disciples in John 1:38.

I share this letter with you for one purpose: that you might reflect on your own journey and consider what you’ve sought Jesus for. What have you given Him to redeem?

He came to heal your every wound, to fill every empty place, to empower you to greatness in Him. But He will not begin to change you if you don’t seek to allow him to. He does not take what has not been given. He will only touch those things in your life that you freely offer Him.

Jesus has called me to transparency. We can’t hide who we are and simultaneously walk in Christ’s light. So today I share with you a little piece of my heart, unedited, taken straight from the pages of one of my journals. As you read my prayer to our Savior, I ask you to join me in lifting your heart before Him. If His Spirit moves you, offer the words to Him as if they were your own. Or better yet, let Him lead you in writing your own prayer of surrender. Be blessed, dear one.

 

My Dear Jesus,

How do I even begin to describe what my heart wants to say to you? You are the filler of all my empty places. You continually bind up the pieces of my broken heart until it can begin to beat again with strength and new life.

My journey with you has not been easy, but it has been worth it. You have opened my eyes to see a glimpse of the glorious mystery that is You. I will never be the same!

At times I’ve wanted to run from you . . . thank you for holding me in your grasp and giving me the strength to hold on.

I commit to you this day that I will bind myself to you for eternity. I choose You! You are Love, Life, Joy, Peace, Comfort, Happiness . . . none of it is found apart from you. Teach me to be a woman who doesn’t want what you can give her . . . who just wants You. I want your Spirit to permeate every ounce of my soul. Empower me to grasp the depth of your love. Have your way, Lord!

I commit to walk in your Truth. I will live by your Truth, stand in your Truth, walk in Truth, speak Truth. Lead me Lord!

My heart’s desire is to be a woman of freedom, totally sold out to You. I will not let the enemy have control over any part of my heart. He will nave no authority here. I am yours! Show me “my truth” Lord. Who am I, and what needs to go?

Here is what I offer you. I give you my heart to be molded and shaped to beat in time with yours. I submit my will to yours, trusting that yours is far better. Take control! I give you my teaching. You have given me a gift. It is for Your Glory. I surrender it to your will and your use. Direct my path.

I offer you my selfishness, knowing that only you have the power to change it. Teach me the glory of the fast.

I offer you my fear. My flesh wants to shrink back from the glory that awaits me . . . your perfect plan for me. I can’t yet see it, but I know the enemy desires to keep me from it. I will not let him win. You are the victory.

I offer you my pride. Oh Lord, what a hard battle that has been. You were there when you saw my growing need for acceptance take shape. You watched in sorrow while I allowed the enemy to shackle me in his yoke. You caught each tear that fell so they would not be wasted. You brought beauty from my pain. I praise you Lord, for your absolute goodness!

I know that pride will be an ongoing battle for me because of that pain. Lord, I give you my need for the approval of men. Help me to walk in freedom. May the use of my gifts ever be about your glory and not mine.

I am weak, but I am yours. I am fearful, but I am yours. I am broken, but I am yours. Take control and lead me on the path I am to take. Let my thoughts be your thoughts. Have your way with me, Lord, that I may dwell in the abiding place of your love.

I love you, Lord. Thank you for showing me how.

Kelley

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