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A Gift of Grace

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Today’s Word on Wednesday comes from my dear friend and partner in ministry, Juliet Sharrow. You may have read some of her testimony in recent months about God’s pursuing love. Now she shares how His gift of grace empowered her to finally respond to Him. After reading her words, you may be blessed to know she just had the privilege of watching this beloved son walk the stage to receive his high school diploma. Whatever you may be going through, know this, dear one. There is ALWAYS hope in Jesus.

A Gift of Grace by Juliet Sharrow

From the fullness of His grace we have all received one blessing after another. John 1:16

I had spent my life running from God. Desperate for love and caught in an abusive relationship, I made one destructive choice after another. Then God did something I didn’t expect. He chose to bless me with a child.

I was so excited when I found out I was pregnant.  I would love my child in all the ways I hadn’t been loved.  I would somehow make it all right.

Then I got the worst news an expectant mother could hear.  The doctor called to tell me that something was wrong with my unborn child.  The routine blood tests they had done showed that my child would have Down’s Syndrome and possibly Spina Bifida as well.  I felt like my world came crashing down.  Then the doctor said something I could scarcely believe.  They were recommending that I have an abortion.

I sunk down on my knees, horrified at what I was hearing!  How could this be? My baby was alive; I could hear the heartbeat and I could feel the kicking.  How could I destroy this precious gift I’d been given?  I did not understand what I was getting into, but I knew one thing: I couldn’t end this child’s life.  He was my hope! I told the doctor in no uncertain terms that I would never choose that for me or my child.

The next several weeks were a blur as medical personnel escorted me into private rooms to watch videos about children with these conditions, “so I would know what I was getting myself into.”  I met with doctors who tried to explain that a woman in my situation— unmarried and with no support network—could certainly not handle a child with issues of this magnitude.  They assured me I did not understand how impossible things would be. But I never wavered.  Somehow I knew that God had blessed me with this child, and I would have this baby no matter what they said.

So a month after I heard the devastating news, I underwent a sonogram to see if the doctor could see the abnormalities that are usually present with these conditions.  What happened next can only be described as a miracle.  There were NO abnormalities.  The baby was perfect in every way!

The doctor insisted there must be some mistake.  And so she checked and rechecked, and decided that the baby was too small for me to be as far along as they originally thought.  Her new measurements said I was one month behind where I should have been and so they changed my due date to one month later.  They retook the blood tests and assured me that everything had come back normal this time!  I cried as I left the doctor’s office that day.

I know now the enemy had tried to convince me to give up on my child, to destroy his precious life.  But somehow God had given me the strength to hold on. Just like He promises in 1 Corinthians 10:13,

“No temptation has seized you except what is common to man.  And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.”

I believe that Satan tempted me with an easy way out.  My life was not good at the time, and bringing a child into that world was what some would call crazy!  But, I know that God provided a way out for me.  He helped me to stand up under it.  He filled me with love for my unborn child. He gave me strength to endure, and His peace soothed my soul.

A few months later my son was born. The doctors said he was 4 weeks premature.  It was 4 days after the original due date they had given me.  And he was perfect, not premature in any way, a healthy 6lb 4oz baby boy!  He was my gift from God.

Psalm 127:3 says, “See children are a gift from the Lord.  The children born to us are our special reward.” (NLV)

At that time in my life I did not deserve any special reward.  I had run from God and turned my back on Him more times than I could count!  But God in His infinite wisdom knew that what I needed was grace.  He gave me this gift instead of what I deserved.

I needed that child because I was in a pit. A pit of self-loathing and self-despair, a pit of oppression.  I was so low I could not find a way out. In fact, I did not WANT out.  I felt like I deserved everything that was happening to me.  God knew what I needed to give me the strength to get out of that pit.  I needed someone else to live for, someone else to love.  I did not love myself enough, but He knew I would love my child enough to claw my way out of that pit.  That through the love of my child, I would finally turn to Him, finally seek Him instead of running from Him. I learned that when I resist temptation and do what I know is right, God will provide the strength I need to endure.  And I would learn the greatest lesson of my life: that God’s grace isn’t based on what I’ve done. It’s about God giving me what He knows I need, even when I don’t deserve it.

A Thirsty Soul, part 2

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A Thirsty Soul, part 2

by Juliet Sharrow

Last week I shared how God met me in my deepest pit and intervened when I tried to take my own life. He not only sent someone to break down my door, He showed up Himself to sing His love over me. I am still amazed by the thought.

You might think that at this point I surrendered my life to the Lord. Nope.

Instead I knew I deserved to be punished, not just for trying to take my own life, but for all the bad choices I had made, for all the times I had turned from God and went my own way. I was so ashamed!  Surely God could not, would not want me. Surely He could never forgive me. How could He love me after everything I had done?

And so I ran, right into the arms of an abusive man. This man was not my husband.  I chose to live in sin even though I knew in my heart it was wrong.  When he hit me the first time, I knew I deserved it. I deserved every beating, every broken bone, every humiliation. I had been searching for love for so long, I was willing to accept any love I could get, even love that hurt.

So for almost three years I suffered beatings every day, and I would think, maybe today he’ll kill me.  Every beating, every name calling chipped away at me a little bit more.  Each blow confirmed what I already knew in my heart of hearts: No one could ever really love me.  No one would ever want me; I was too broken and too damaged. Satan worked his magic through the fists and words of an abusive man, but once again God had other plans for me. Even though I had turned from Him yet again, He continued to pursue me.

This time He sent me a precious gift, a life saving gift. He sent me a child.  I was so excited when I found out I was pregnant.  I would love my child in all the ways I had not been loved.  I would somehow make it all right.  I just knew that this child would satisfy my thirsty soul.

Finally, my son was born. In my whole life I had never felt what I felt for this child!  It was a love I could not understand.  I loved him with everything that was in me.  And I thought I had finally satisfied that longing, finally quenched my thirst.

But when I brought my son home from the hospital, I was still waist deep in my pit.  I remained in a very dangerous, very abusive relationship with my son’s father.  I was afraid for my life and for my son’s life, but I was too scared and too weak to do anything about it. And, I was still living in sin with a man who was not my husband.  So I prayed that God would change my abuser so we could be a family.  That’s one prayer I am thankful God answered with a no.  Instead God began to change me.

He began to change the way I saw my abuser. Eventually I got to the point that I loathed the man I once loved, hating every minute I spent with him. I even cringed at the sound of his voice. I no longer saw him through the tainted view of desperate love. Instead I saw the reality of who he was. I believe God was working in me to prepare me to leave.  He had to change my heart and my thinking about this man to give me the strength to go.  He needed to get me to a place that when I came face to face with my Lord there would be no looking back, no going back!

During this time, my love for my son only grew.  I took many beatings to protect him. I cried out to God to save him from my fate. And one day the revelation came: someday, this man would hit my son.  I could not let that happen.  I would do anything for this child, and he deserved a better life than this. I loved him so much I’d die to save him, and that’s when God changed my life forever. He spoke right into my heart, “Don’t you see? That’s how much I love you. I gave up MY son for you!”

I thought of John 3:16,

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

I realized that God so loved Juliet, He was willing to sacrifice His son for me! I could not understand how He could love me after what I had done. I had turned my back on Him so many times, and I chose to run the other way even when He met me as I lay dying.

But the sins of my past didn’t matter. That day God reminded me how much He loved me. He reminded me how He had sung over me as I tried to take my own life, reminded me that He had offered me the gift of grace through my son. And He reminded me that He would always love me, no matter how far away I ran, or how many times I turned my back on Him, or how many bad choices I made. He showed me how He had pursued me and met me time and time again in my moments of greatest need.

No matter what I look like or what I’ve done, He loves me as I am! He loved me first. And this time when my God met me in my circumstance, I turned to Him.  I received what He was offering me, the water of life.  I had no regrets, no thoughts of running, just an overwhelming sense of relief, that all the searching and all the pain was finally over.  And the void I had been trying to fill for so many years was finally filled.

My encounter with God saved my life in more ways than one. I finally found the strength to leave my abuser. And I found the love I had been searching for since the day He knit me together in my mother’s womb in the arms of my heavenly Father.

Our God works in ways beyond our comprehension.  He sees our whole life laid out before Him, and He knows what you and I thirst for. He knows what it will take to get us to turn to Him, and He knows precisely when we finally will.  And so He has written it in the stars, for each and every one of us, a clandestine date when He meets us face to face in the midst of our pit to offer us the water of life.

You can be sure He will go out of His way to be there. The question is, will you receive what He is offering you?  Or will you go away thirsty and continue your futile search to fill the emptiness inside.  Please know today that NOTHING in this world will quench your thirst.  Nothing else will satisfy. Only Christ can give you what you are searching for.  Only He can refresh your weary soul and breathe life back into your hopeless world.

What will you do at your next encounter with the King of Kings?

Missing the Blessing

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The Lord said to him, “Who gave human beings their mouths? Who makes them deaf or mute? Who gives them sight or makes them blind? Is it not I, the Lord?”  Exodus 4:11, NIV

One of my sons is a bit unhappy right now with a few of God’s choices for him. The way he puts it, “I got all the bad stuff from my parents.” It’s hard being twelve.

This year he has watched his friends propel past him several inches in height, shooting steadily upward as they hit their 7th grade growth spurts. His growth has been decidedly slower, and he fears he’s going to be short like his mom. He has also been blessed with dad’s teeth—which come complete with braces—and now he’s just discovered he has his mother’s eyes. Apparently glasses are in his future. As I said, it’s hard being twelve.

And right now, these things he perceives as limitations have obscured his view of anything else. He can’t see past them. They’ve completely overshadowed any thought of his potential. He doesn’t yet understand that every part of himself he views as weakness provides an opportunity for God to show His strength.

You and I tend to do the same thing. We get stuck on our limitations and often allow them to rob us of joy and blessings that wait just on the horizon. Even our friend Moses left some things on the table, and Scripture records that he left a legacy like no other.

Since then, no prophet has risen in Israel like Moses, whom the Lord knew face to face . . . For no one has ever shown the mighty power or performed the awesome deeds that Moses did in the sight of all Israel.  Deuteronomy 34:10, 12

Let’s rejoin Moses in the desert and uncover what he may have missed!

Last week we took a front row seat to his encounter with God through a burning bush. Out of all the people on the face of the earth, God chose Moses to lead His chosen people to their deliverance. What had Moses done to deserve such an honor? Absolutely nothing. God found him hiding in the desert, consumed by his past failure.

But God doesn’t call us based on our incredible strengths and abilities. He calls us according to His purpose. Moses hadn’t earned the position God held out to him. God had simply offered Him a gift of grace. His responses to Moses’ protests prove that to be true. 

God didn’t answer Moses’ doubt by building him up and encouraging his abilities. What Moses could or couldn’t do didn’t matter. God answered by promising Moses three things.

·      I will be with you. Exodus 3:12

·      I AM all that you need.  Exodus 3:14

·      I will prove to the people that I am with you through miraculous signs. Exodus 4:1-9

Still, Moses remained unconvinced. Immediately upon experiencing a miraculous display of God’s power, Moses offered up his final retort.

Moses said to the Lord, “O Lord, I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue.”  Exodus 4:10

Part of me wants to interrupt their conversation right here and ask Moses, “Are you serious?” I mean, He had just seen God turn the staff he was holding into a snake and watched his own hand become leprous and then healed at God’s command. Yet he faced God and said, “I don’t think so. I don’t like the way I talk.”

Pay close attention to God’s response.

The Lord said to him, “Who gave man his mouth? Who makes him deaf or mute? Who gives him sight or makes him blind? Is it not I, the Lord? Now go; I will help you speak and will teach you what to say.”  Exodus 4:11-12

Essentially God said to Moses, “I made your mouth. I will help you speak.”

But Moses said, “O Lord, please send someone else to do it.”  Then the Lord’s anger burned against Moses . . . Exodus 4:13-14

Sometimes we need to be careful what we wish for. Even after all of God’s promises and a grand display of miraculous power, Moses asked God to send someone else. In anger, God granted Moses’ request, but that still didn’t get Moses out of going.

“What about your brother, Aaron the Levite? I know he can speak well. He is already on his way to meet you, and his heart will be glad when he sees you. You shall speak to him and put words in his mouth; I will help both of you speak and will teach you what to do. He will speak to the people for you, and it will be as if he were your mouth . . .” Exodus 4:14-16

Don’t miss the cost of Moses’ stubbornness, dear one. Yes, God in His mercy provided Aaron to help Moses communicate with the people, but Moses forfeited a miracle God wanted to perform on his behalf. God didn’t plan to have another man speak for Moses “as if he were [his] mouth” (verse 16). God desired to reveal His power through Moses by making his mouth speak (verse 12)! God’s purpose still prevailed, but poor Moses argued himself right out of his blessing.

I wonder how many times you and I have talked ourselves out of a blessing God had waiting on the edge of a step of faith. How often have we wrestled against God’s purpose for our lives and refused to trust Him for His best?

I have a confession to make. I taught this lesson on Moses in my Sunday school class two weeks ago. When we reached these verses uncovering this missed blessing, conviction fell over me so powerfully, I couldn’t speak for a moment. I physically felt God’s presence from head to toe, and He whispered to my heart, “That’s you, dear one.” Tears stung my eyes and my voice caught in my throat. Before I even had time to think about it, I closed my eyes before the class, lifted my face toward heaven and answered Him, “God forgive me.”

You see, I have chosen to live my life for the glory of the Lord, and amazingly, He has used this life to bring about some small part of His plan for the nations. But I realize I tend to act like Moses did when God invited Him to participate. At times I believe I’ve allowed my view of myself and my limitations to overshadow my view of God. In those moments, God has still used me to bring about His will, but perhaps I’ve missed some of what God wanted to do for me in the process. I don’t want to leave any more blessings on the table!

God has things to do right now in our generation. Let’s commit together to believe big things of God. The God who made our mouths can cause them to speak with boldness. The God who made the seas still has power to make them part. God is so much bigger than our limitations. As we readily respond in faith, we may just get to witness His great power.

“Be dressed ready for service and keep your lamps burning. . . so that when he comes and knocks [you] can immediately open the door for him. Luke 12:35-36

 

 

Grace

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Greetings from the beautiful island of Maui, Hawaii! I am vacationing this week with my husband and sons, enjoying a brief period of rest and praising God for His wondrous creation. I will be back next week!

In the meantime, I'm happy to introduce you to my dear friend, Kelly Grecco. She serves alongside her husband in ministry, loving the kids in our area through Youth For Christ. She's also the proud mother of two high school students. Today, she shares a few thoughts on grace. I pray that her words bless you.

Kelly Grecco

 

Grace by Kelly Grecco

  "For by grace you have been saved through faith.  And this is not your own doing; it is a gift from God."  Ephesians 2:8, ESV

I have heard this verse for years. I could have probably recited it for you for most of my teen and young adult years. However, I can not say that I truly "knew" this verse. I did not know it deep in my heart and soul where God wanted me to know it. While I could recite it, I never took in for myself the part about grace.

For most of my growing up years, I carried scars deep inside. If I had been different, been a better kid, been prettier or smarter, then my father would not have left. He would not have cast me aside as if I were worthless trash. He would not have made it clear that he wanted nothing to do with me.  While I would never have verbally said any of these things, the scars were deep, and I believed what I had been told and shown. I was worthless. I was not worth his time. I had no value in his mind. While I knew, intellectually, that those things were not true, I still carried them in my heart.

When I accepted Christ as my Savior, I knew He could heal me of all of those thoughts. The problem was, because I believed them, I could and would not let Him bring them into the light and expose them for what they were. Lies.

Because I did not allow God to deal with them, I tried my very best to be good enough for Him. I tried to clean myself up so I could be acceptable. The problem with that is that none of us can ever be "good enough" on our own. It is only through Jesus' sacrifice that we can even approach Him.

So, God brought me face to face with this verse. He brought me face to face with grace. What is grace? By definition, grace is favor or goodwill;   a manifestation of favor, especially by a superior; mercy, clemency, pardon; to favor, honor, exalt.

You see, because we are not worthy, God had to gift us with worthiness through Jesus. He did not owe it to us, we could never earn it, so He offered it to us freely–not because of who we are or what we have done,  but because of who He is, what He has done and because He desires a relationship with us. He had to show me that, by letting Him deal with the lies that were poured into me and that I chose to believe, His grace could truly set me free.

It is not an easy process, believe me. It hurts. It is revealing of more than we sometimes even know is there. However, it is SO worth it. In return, God pours Himself into us and fills us with truth and His spirit. A gift of grace, of relationship and freedom that we can never truly imagine until we accept it.